Read Retief's War by Keith Laumer Online


THAT RESOURCEFUL RETIEF IS BACK!It's Retief the galactic policeman and Earthman on a visit to the planet of Quopp, where Earthmen must tread quietly or not at all. But Ambassador Longspoon has a plan to unite all the hostile tribes of Quopp under one government -- to make them more friendly to Earth.Yet already Retief has learned of another plan -- the evil, half-human, haTHAT RESOURCEFUL RETIEF IS BACK!It's Retief the galactic policeman and Earthman on a visit to the planet of Quopp, where Earthmen must tread quietly or not at all. But Ambassador Longspoon has a plan to unite all the hostile tribes of Quopp under one government -- to make them more friendly to Earth.Yet already Retief has learned of another plan -- the evil, half-human, half-machine Goaci's plan to destroy the whole scheme -- and he must act with incredible speed and cunning if he is to avert impending planetary chaos!FOLLOW THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF RETIEF -- ALREADY AN UNDERGROUND HERO...

Title : Retief's War
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 9780671818630
Format Type : Paperback
Number of Pages : 172 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

Retief's War Reviews

  • Jack
    2019-03-06 01:26

    This is probably the third or fourth time I've read this book and again, I enjoy the way Laumer pokes fun at liberals, bureaucracy and bureaucrats. Retief is the "James Bond" of the galaxy, deftly handing any manner of problem that may pop up, working his way around bumbling superiors and rescuing both planets and babes from the hands of those power-hungry minions that would do harm to both.His tongue-in-cheek presentation will keep you chuckling.

  • Tim Poston
    2019-03-17 04:49

    I first read this fifty years ago, as an (almost) beardless youth, and was delighted to find a second hand copy in Bookworm. It is pure froth, unlike for instance, which gave me tools I still think with. But it's joyful froth, including my all-time favourite threat in all of science fiction:"To remember which side of the bread substitute has the ikky-wax on it."

  • Ginger Heskett
    2019-03-13 01:30

    I registered a book at!

  • Robert J. Sullivan
    2019-03-24 02:46

    Retief, the resourceful and indomitable diplomat who faces countless dangers in the service of the Corps Diplomatique Terrestienne, is on the planet Quopp, with its many forms of wheeled and rotored inhabitants. The Voion, one of the races, have been selected by the CDT to set up a planetary government to replace the cheerful chaos the inhabitants employ. Unfortunately, the Voions idea of peace is subjugating or exterminating all the others.Retief has his hands full setting up a counter-revolution to oppose the Voion, leading the army, rescuing ten Terran females lost in the jungle and preventing the execution of the whole Terran embassy. His longtime nemeses, the five-eyed Groaci, put in an appearance, getting their sticky fingers in where they aren't wanted.Light-hearted, silly, funny and fast-moving, filled with the evocatively-named embassy staff (Ambassador Longspoon, Commander Underknuckle), aliens with strange speech patterns and bizarre forms, Laumer throws jabs at diplomacy and meddling in other countries' affairs that probably come from his personal experience in the Diplomatic Service.

  • Traummachine
    2019-03-15 06:44

    2.5 stars:It had been 7 years since I last read a Retief of my first reviews ever! I read several Laumer books in the interim, so I figured it was high time to get back to what started it all, Retief.Sadly, this wasn't that great. Just like the first time I read some Retief, I feel like he overstays his welcome in a short novel, and is much better in Laumer's short fiction. Retief's War felt largely like "There, he barely got out of that one, what should I throw at him next?". It just got really old really fast.In the short stories, there's a larger percentage spent on the setup, which I found more entertaining than the descriptions of Retief's quick jabs, upper cuts, and barrel rolls. They also contained a lot more of the dry wit I was looking for.It's rare to find Laumer in a used bookstore, but that's probably the only way I'll read more Retief stories. I'll stick with Laumer's more serious works, or Harrison's Stainless Steel Rat stories when I want something in this vein.

  • Curtiss
    2019-03-12 03:50

    This novel postulates a charming alien adaptation; every creature on the planet incorporates the wheel in some form or other as part of its body scheme, even flying creatures with rotor blades instead of wings, as a means of locomotion.Retief is possibly Science Fiction's most humorous, and also invariably triumphant, recurring character; embodying the intelligence and machismo of James Bond (Retief's portrayal on the cover art of some of the books is rather remininiscent of James Coburn as Derek Flint from the Our Man Flint movies) and the wit and behind-the scenes manipulation of P.G. Wodehouse's Jeeves.Pick up any Retief novel or short-story collection and you're in for a rollicking "Good Read"! So uncork a bottle of Bacchus Black or Bacchus Red and toast the skewering of any number of Groacci foes (rhymes with whacky) accompanied by a repast of toasted Gribble Grubbs and sliced Hoob Melons for dessert.

  • Christopher Taylor
    2019-02-28 08:25

    I have always enjoyed the Retief books for their witty combination of fun and action. This one was more of that fun, with the rascal diplomat on a planet with strange biomechanical insects and creatures made of various metals.A recent arrival, he discovers one section of the population trying to take over the planet with the help of a alien race which is rival to the Terrans in opening trade and cultural relations with the planet. The underdog and constantly in trouble, Retief is always three steps ahead of everyone, but always in a plausible, witty way.Terrific fun sci fantasy work with lots of clever ideas, and a hero you can't help but enjoy.

  • George
    2019-03-17 06:29

    #3 in Laumer's Jame Retief science fiction series. These were written in the 1960's, but are still fun to read. Retief is a diplomat in the Corps Terrestienne Diplomatique which are the "good guys" in the inter galactic rivalry with the Groaci who are the "bad guys." This is an essentially tongue in cheek series in which Retief's superiors are hopeless incompetents and Retief's always is there to save the day and set things right.

  • Debbie
    2019-03-11 00:31

    This book was not as much fun as Retief of the CDT. It deals mainly with war and rebellion tactics than the crazy antics of incompetent diplomats. I generally find war and battle scenes borng. Would I have been more interested if it took place on a planet full of bunnies and puppies instead of insects? Maybe....

  • Jayw
    2019-03-17 04:53

    Simpleminded Terran ambassador sets greedy and stupid race up to subjugate planet of wheeled insect beings. Fortunately, galactic good guy Retief is around to save the planet, the beautiful ship wrecked space travelers and the rum traders.

  • bluetyson
    2019-03-21 05:33

    Retief's War by Keith Laumer (2000)

  • Mike S
    2019-03-23 00:42

    Typical Laumer: fast-paced, funny, imaginative, irreverent, insightful, a fun read. I look forward to reading everything Laumer ever wrote. I usually don't like terse, but he does it really well.

  • Steve Bryan
    2019-02-27 04:25

    A fun but loosely written romp! If you have read other Retief's you will enjoy this... If not, better to start on one of the earlier works....

  • Peter
    2019-03-06 02:46

    Retief - need I say more